And the word of the day is: PRETENTIOUS.
I feel that it is important to clarify the meaning of this word because I hear it quite often, and it is always used incorrectly. Pretentious is not synonymous with "intellectual" or "arrogant." It is not an appropriate knee-jerk response to anyone that says they like Radiohead or Wes Anderson films. It is not something that you would call a spoiled rich kid.
No, pretentious means exactly what it sounds like. A person is pretentious if he or she pretends to be something they are not. Generally, pretentious people are deeply insecure and feel that others will not like them if they show their true selves. So they put on airs of being more sophisticated, knowledgeable, or wealthy than they really are, in order to gain acceptance within a desired peer group.
Intellectuals are always being unfairly labeled as pretentious. If you meet someone who tells you they read for pleasure, and you can't imagine such a thing because you hate reading, does that mean the reader is pretentious? No, it just means that they enjoy reading. What if the reader believes they are superior to you because they read and you don't? Arrogant, yes. Narrow-minded, yes. Pretentious, no. However, if this person tells you they like to read because they want you to think they are smart, but is unable to name a single work by Shakespeare, then they are pretentious.
People have called me pretentious for being anal about spelling and grammar and for using big words in my speech. Unfortunately for those verbally-challenged buffoons, this really is the way I talk. I'm proud of my vocabulary I like knowing that my friends have to consult their dictionaries every now and then because of me. You could say that I'm full of myself. You could even describe me as annoying if that's how you really feel about it. But I am not pretentious.
And if it isn't my use of language that has people calling me pretentious, then it's my taste in movies, or my hobbies, or the things I like to talk about. Smart women, believe it or not, enjoy discussing topics other than celebrity gossip and fashion and men. Just because someone likes and appreciates something you don't understand does not mean that person is pretentious.
This is particularly true when it comes to musical preferences. There is no band in the world accused of being pretentious more often than the British five-piece critics' darling that I love, the one and only Radiohead. Why the hell does everyone who is not a fan of Radiohead think they are so pretentious? Because they like to try on different musical styles? Experimentation does not make you pretentious, it makes you experimental. Because every album they've released has gotten rave reviews? Critical acclaim does not make you pretentious, it makes you critically acclaimed. Because Thom Yorke has been known to be unfriendly towards other artists? Being antisocial does not make you pretentious, it makes you antisocial. Or is it just because Radiohead's music does not appeal to you and you don't understand why they are so popular? Guess what, that doesn't make them pretentious either.
The only correct use of the word pretentious to describe a music band is when that band exists for any reason other than the love of making music.
And what about Radiohead's fans? Since you don't like the band, people who do must be pretentious, right? Wrong. People who like Radiohead enjoy listening to their music, period. It would be a waste of time and money to buy albums, go to concerts, and scour the Internet for rarities and B-sides, just to prove you like a band that you really don't care for.
I suppose it wouldn't be a waste of money to pretend to like anything if money were no object to you, which brings me to my next category of unjustly-labeled-as-pretentious people: rich folks. People with money are often showy, self-absorbed, blissfully ignorant, conceited, and materialistic, but none of those adjectives mean the same thing as pretentious. Don't get me wrong. I've met some wealthy people that are annoying as hell; their lifestyles are extravagant and ridiculous, and they think they're better than everyone. But they aren't pretending to be anything. They really are flush with cash.
It's usually members of the bourgeoisie (middle to upper-middle class) that are pretentious in matters of wealth. People who carry fake designer bags, or empty out their savings accounts in order to buy a watch, or drive a Lexus when they can only afford a Toyota - and what's wrong with a Toyota, by the way? - those people are pretentious. I feel sorry for them. They actually believe that a show of material wealth adds to their value as a human being! What a sorry outlook to have on life.
The easiest way to tell whether or not someone is pretentious is to figure out what it is they are trying to prove. Luckily, pretentious people aren't that creative, so there are only a handful of things that all pretentious people want others to believe about them: that they are wealthier, smarter, braver, cooler, more cultured, more popular, and more accomplished than they really are.
And if someone gets on your nerves for whatever reason, but doesn't seem to have anything to prove, then you still can't call them pretentious. Lots of people don't like me, but they'll be hard-pressed to find a more honest person.
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