(even though you're broke)
1. Find a job that requires minimal commitment time-wise.
Living like a rock star is all about having amazing experiences, and you can’t have those if you’re tied to your desk 60 hours a week and have to get your time off approved by a boss. Ideally, you’ll want to find a consultant position that pays a high hourly wage and ends 3 to 6 months after you start. Believe it or not, this doesn’t mean that you have to constantly look for a job – find a good consulting firm and they’ll do all the looking for you. All you have to do is show up, work the duration of the contract, save some money, and blow it later… preferably on the other side of the world until you can get another contract.
The other option is to actually be a rock star. Play music for a living, go on tour, sleep with groupies. If you can’t swing that, then I’d stick with the consultant thing.
2. Use whatever you do earn to travel. Curb your enthusiasm for material goods.
If you’re anything like me, your funds are limited, so you’ll have to allocate them wisely. You can buy yourself a nice car and new clothes, but I personally think you’ll be better off if you get out there, see the world, meet people, and have your mind blown. (You can have other parts blown too if you want, but you might have to pay for it.) The point is that experience and knowledge will always trump having lots of stuff. Possessions will hold you back and anchor you to a place, whereas ideas and memories will set you free. They can be taken anywhere and shared with anyone.
3. Never pay for drugs.
Mind you, that's not the same as saying never try drugs; in fact, I have no moral objection to recreational use whatsoever. The reason I think you should never pay for drugs is that I believe it changes your mentality towards the experience – you go from having a good time on occasion to seeking it out regularly and always having a stash on hand. I hope I don’t have to tell anyone how stupid it is to develop a drug habit. First, it’s expensive, and second, no 12-minute high is worth spending your life in and out of rehab, dealing with shady people on a regular basis, getting caught and going to prison, losing your friends/family/life savings, or having your heart explode.
However, if you're in the mood for an alternate reality or just wanna amp up that trashy one-night stand a bit, what I suggest you do is find some people that like to party, attend whatever questionable after-hours event they invite you to, flirt with a
4. Be confident, witty, and fun.
There’s no point in living like a rock star if you’re not gonna act like one. More importantly, being a fun person means that others will enjoy your company and want to have you around. While this seems obvious, you will be surprised at what people are willing to do in order to have you around. One of my friends was so desperate to get rid of his then-girlfriend that he bought me a ticket to Japan just to piss her off. Okay, yeah, so maybe I was being used, but still. He could have picked someone else to go on the trip with.
5. Stick to your principles and stand up for your friends.
Want an entourage? Be a strong person and let the people you care about know that you'll always have their back. But this isn't just about having an entourage, even if it is very rock 'n' roll. It's more about the fact that you’ll always have your pride and the respect of others, including your enemies. In almost every instance where I’ve stood my ground, I’ve won, because I was doing the right thing and the opposing side knew it. You might run the risk of getting arrested by a uniformed asshole and spending the night in jail while the friend you were defending holds a bag of ice over his swollen black eye, but as long as you weren’t doing anything wrong, the City of Mountain View can’t charge you with a crime.
6. If you must impulse-buy, make it awesome.
I’m in Australia right now. My friends and family are just now finding out, because I didn’t get around to telling them. This is because I bought the plane ticket 4 days before it was scheduled to depart. I know. Awesome, right?
I can’t do this all the time of course, and I live in a shitty apartment and eat cereal for dinner every night, but who cares? I don’t think about those things and I definitely won’t remember them when I’m on my deathbed. However, there is absolutely nothing that will eclipse the memory of having impulse-bought a trip to Australia and having the time of my life. Unless I take too many drugs. See #3.
7. Keep your mind open to new experiences.
You can’t be a rock star and not have something to write about. Sometimes things will turn out well and sometimes they won’t; sometimes you’ll face your fears and overcome them and sometimes you’ll shit your pants. Whatever. No experience is a bad one if you can later turn it into a hit song.
8. Don’t worry about what others think.
Your parents will take issue with your refusal to get a “real” job. Your friends will worry about your finances. Your younger sister will tell you that you need to grow up. But it’s your life, and you can’t spend your one shot at earthly existence trying to please others. Well, you can, but then you’d be wasting it.
9. Always use a condom.
While I realize that having a sexually transmitted disease is very rock ‘n’ roll, it is also very painful, itchy, deadly, and unsexy. It’s okay to sleep around, but be smart about it. No, I’m not writing from personal experience.
10. Never fall in love.
Nothing gets in the way of spur-of-the-moment traveling and casual sex like having a special someone in your life. Don’t do it. You could be out and about in a foreign city with new friends, wreaking havoc on the locals, or you could stay in and do boring things like watch a movie while cuddling (if your special someone is present), or sit in front of your computer and write (if they are not). Your choice.
